I was slower than other kids growing up. I had to be held back. By the 6th grade I was in all regular classes and off medication. That was the cool part. But even though I had a good Christian upbringing in a loving home, I had been abused by my biological father. I guess I appeared to have it all together as a teen. But underneath I was majorly struggling.

My life spiraled out of control after I graduated when I got a job at a local factory. A bunch of the guys were harassing me and bullying me every day at work. Instead of telling anyone, I held it in. The pressure got to be too much, so I began drinking and using drugs. I was so far from God, I couldn't hear his voice if he did speak.

The only thoughts going through my mind was suicide. I thought if I ended my life it would be better for everyone. Thankfully, my mom got a little nosy and read the stuff I was writing on my laptop one day and got me help. I had to stay in the hospital for awhile to detox and get my head together. But I thought once I got out, I'd be good to go and live on my own.

Wrong! The old pain soon returned and I turned back to drinking and drugs. Whenever I'd get mad or upset, I'd grab any sharp object and cut myself. One day, I grabbed a knife from the kitchen counter and without thinking I drove the 10 inch blade into my skin. That was the last time I cut--praise God I'm still alive to tell about it.

After spending a little time in the hospital, I returned home to live with my parents, stopped drinking and doing drugs, and gave my heart back to Jesus. I went onto Bible College where I received a degree in Christian Ministry. Today I'm working at the Community Mental Health Center helping those with mental disabilities and sharing my testimony at schools and churches to help others break free from cutting and self-abuse.

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